Corey, we subscribe and follow you not because we expect you to perform and be a certain way all of the time. Yes, living on the boat inspired us all in some ways, and we love your sense of adventure.
But I’ve learned life isn’t nonstop satisfaction and knowing what we want. It’s a lot of learning. It’s okay to not know what you want to do. It’s okay to still be figuring things out. It’s okay if you decide to stay in Guatemala and live a different life.
I think many are here not just for your boat life, but for what you embody, what you provoke in us, and who you are as a person.
We’re rooting for you, whether that be on the high seas or the colorful streets of Guatemala. Keep on keeping on, my friend! 💙
I really appreciate that, Brandi! And i know this, deep down. I really can't exaggerate how grateful I am that strangers have given my words some sort of extra consideration. You're spot on that life is all about learning, often bumbling forward in the dark, still assessing everything & making decisions from each new place. And at some point last week, I actually accepted that this is what my writing will be about when it's true, because I don't know how to be anything else.
I appreciate your words & connection so much! What I embody, what I provoke in you, & who I am as a person... Wow, that is something I'm taking with me today. And no matter what, I'll keep writing & sharing.
I always find your posts inspiring but this one might have impacted me the most. There is something so powerful about someone who inspires you saying “I don’t know what I’m doing.” It’s a great reminder that we all don’t really know what we’re doing in a way, but we just have to keep finding the next right thing that calls to us. Really enjoyed hearing the other examples from your readers as well. I travelled for a year after high school and it was amazing and gave me stories and so much perspective, but I never could have done it indefinitely. The next right thing after that was college. And now it’s figuring out what my writing life looks like (and that’s been a crazy adventure with so many ups and downs!)
Transitional periods are hard and I can’t wait to be out of the one I’m currently in, but I think there’s a beauty in it too. It’s a privilege to ‘keep figuring myself out’ and I try to remind myself of that everytime I’m in the pit of despair.
Aleah, I'm so glad that you connected with this! I enjoyed our conversation last week SO MUCH. Thanks for sharing about your adventures, too. One of the things i learned from those comments last week was that many of us will simply "stay busy" doing something that *feels* productive, & that quiets the questions about "WHAT AM I DOING?" You can easily say, THIS! But only in retrospect will you know whether that thing was useful/meaningful/productive. It really shows me the importance of *moving*. Toward something. Either toward a dream, if you have one, or toward something important to you in that moment, at that time in your life, that may or may not have some "pay off" in the end. Because the pay off is moving toward the thing that's calling.
“The payoff is moving toward the thing that’s calling”!!!!
You have a way of putting things that makes concepts I’ve heard before but never truly metabolized really hit me!
Sometimes I think about the concept of “the golden years”. When I’m older, what will be the time in my life that I dream of/long for the most? Am I living “the golden years” right now and not truly appreciating it? what will actually be the most fulfilling in retrospect? Maybe the best part of life is in the in-between.
Thanks, Aleah! The best part of life are gonna include the times that were easy & beautiful, but also the ones that were most challenging in the moment. The latter will be extremely meaningful because you were faced with some hardship, you keep trudgin along, & you built toward something as a result (even it's "just" new knowledge about yourself). You are totally right about the Golden Years & I think about this all the time...
I remember when i was 19yo i lived in Australia by myself & now, 20 years later, I could talk for 60 minutes about the amazing parts about it, but the reality? I was miserable for much of it. Haha. My boyfriend had just broken up with me! I missed my friends back home! I was f*ing BROKE. But man, I tell you, when I got back I had some STORIES. And it was the coolest feeling having done something that people only talk about doing...
This is so true!! The worst times in my life were by far when I felt static, purposeless and bored. I feel grateful to have purpose, even if I don’t really know what I’m doing with it right now. It is comforting to tell myself that these could be the golden years, and I just don’t even know it yet. :)
I'm in a weird transition period of my life right now, too, and reading this really helped me feel less alone. Fittingly enough, my last post was about how I don't know what the heck I'm doing or where I'm going. I've also been starting to feel the glimmer of a horizon over the past few days, which makes me feel a lot better. Of course it's not anything related to any of my former dreams — being a mom, circumstances related to my family are now mainly dictating my path. But I'm at least starting to see and accept the beginning of a path laid in front of me, and it feels a lot better than flailing.
Interestingly enough, I was also sick through this last week and something about lying in bed gives more weight to an existential crisis. Glad you're feeling better and seem to be on the upswing.
I'm so happy that you're feeling better, too, & i totally understand what you're talking about with the added existential crisis. Also, i'm so happy that this essay meant something to you. I think it's soooo key to pay attention to those glimmers & not close your eyes or throw a towel over them or anything. i know tons of people who don't seem to get those new glimmers at all anymore, or they do but they instantly talk themselves out of pursuing them. Glad to hear, even though there are real constraints in your life, that you know you can chart a new path & walk it! And it's perfectly OK if it's something different. That's how sailing was for me. It can inject a new jolt of life into everything & expand your horizons so much more!
Hi Cory, many times in my 21 years of traveling I didn’t know the next step after being immersed in one culture and wondering what to do next.
This hits differently when we’re on the road full time, still working and managing life abroad but it will come to you, you can relax into the unknown and let it guide you.
It’s not structured like “regular life” so you can enjoy going off script and creating it as you go along.
Thanks Mary! Love what you said about the different structure compared to "regular life". Being abroad doesn't fix everything, but at the same time it's providing a VERY different *container* than would exist back in the U.S. There have been moments where it's tempting to "just move back, get a job, get 'responsible' again." I think succumbing to that stuff would be the biggest mistake, because it's actually quite hard to do what you need when you have the pressures of a full-time job & American consumer culture & everything else yelling in your face..... as many people reading this can attest. So? I'm grateful for my in-between today :)
This was such a real and inspirational read! Life isn’t really one adventure, but I’m realizing just a stack of adventures on top of each other! And I think - at least for me- we feel this pressure of THIS is me, and changing our minds or a new direction feels wrong or goes against that established self.
I love love love that eventually the narrow is gone and it’s cool and ok and normal to go seek out another bone.
And it makes me think we probs don’t savor what was enough while we are searching for the next bone.
So many great noodling thoughts in my brain because of reading this! Thank you!
Kayla, I'm so glad this touched you & gave you great noodling thoughts (including the bone/marrow metaphor). As a sharer of words, there's no greater compliment than that. And you're so dang right: it's a STACK of adventures. We all kinda acknowledge this when we think about life as a bunch of book chapters, right? But in a book, you are holding all the pages & you know even when there's a cliffhanger halfway through that the book goes on & likely all has some meaning. In life, the meaning isn't apparent at all times. So there's doubt. But like you said, we actually gotta savor it. And we DO have to trust that the next chapter is just waiting to emerge.
There is something incredibly humanizing, connecting, and validating about the questions and hardships you are sharing. I was partly drawn to your writing because of a past unactualized desire to live aboard a boat and sail. I’ve stuck around to hear more of your journey, maybe to revisit that desire, possibly imagining how it would have unfurled by living vicariously through you. This in-between phase you are in is hardly a disappointment. The weight of continuing to carry out my past unmet desire is not on you. The honesty you are sharing about your process is more valuable and I am thankful for it.
The current in-between or phase I am in, at least what I’m telling myself, is one of “hunkering down” and “getting more financially stable”. Giving myself around a year before deciding what the next venture will be. Whether I am actually shying away from taking action now or taking a needed step of preparation, I’m not sure. The hope is to find something fuller, something of greater vitality. Wondering if the right next steps are following the “glimmer”, whatever that is for me, whether it ultimately brings what I hope for or not. And maybe much of the value found in life is what is learned along the way of that pursuit.
I reallllly appreciate this honest message of both relateablility and also support. Thank you for sharing your journey, too. The journey you’re describing sounds really positive to me. Especially if the plan is to build the money you WOULD need for any move while also simultaneously testing out what that might be.
Even though i’m not in the advice-giving business per se, I’ve found though that merely focusing on the goal of “financial stability” isn’t specific enough, because you may just be searching for stability around a life that no longer works; and also, you don’t really know the target & therefore that can make it forever elusive. For example, i didn’t think I had enough money to start this sailing adventure because i never bothered to make the budget.
That said, if you’re not sure what you’re saving toward, it seriously helps to just get SUPER rigorous about saving/investing/paying down debts for its own sake. I’ve heard people say that’s boring, but I have also seen those people say that & stay miserable & stuck for years & years. You know that the pathways to the next thing has some relation to financial well-being, so imo THAT in & of itself is super exciting to get in order. Celebrate each win, even if it’s $100 or $500 here & there.
While I’m figuring out my next path, I am making a bit of cash teaching online (not related to the subject I want to make a “forever plan” but something I know well, enjoy decently, & helps plug the budget gaps), and it has honestly started to get super exciting because it’s relieving the budgetary pressures. Like it’s going to unlock the next step BECAUSE financial insecurity is less of a factor in whatever my next decision. But that said, I don’t want to feel TOO stable because it’s really not the life I want long-term.
I really hope that you discover your next step & then take it. Even if it’s crewing on other sailboats, or somehow getting out there & taking some big steps ASAP on a path that will lead to sailing. If that’s something you want to do, you won’t regret DOING IT (but may regret the alternative). Y
ou’ll never have everything figured out fulling & it’s truly amazing what can be built on the fly. I’m sooooo glad to hear that my journey hasn’t discouraged you but it sounds like it’s probably been the opposite, and that gives me great joy!
Keep testing your ideas, keep getting your financial house in order, jump before you feel read, & never give up the hope.
Thanks for the encouragement. It’s nice to get a nudge in a certain direction. This is probably the first time I’ve really been intentionally focused on saving up and it’s interesting to see how that shift in priorities impacts my day to day. Hoping to harness some of that excitement you mention to help get through the duller days. And yeah, I definitely want to start getting more clear on what I might be working towards. Testing things out in the meantime can be a fun process (at least I want it to be!). Look forward to hearing more about where your next steps lead you.
My dad had a lot of trouble after our 10 month sail figuring out what was next. "After sailing around the world, golf isnt really that interesing" he said. Being retired is a little different, since you dont really HAVE to do anything. But i think a lot of people struggle with what is next.
Back in 90s and early 2000s there was a round the world yacht race sponsored by British Telecom (BT) it was started by Chay Blyth in 1989 and took place every four years. Chay had sailed solo around the globe more than once.
As a Bang & Olufsen franchisee I was invited to Southampton on the southern coast of England along with many other franchisees for a day's sailing on one of the BT Challenge yachts. They were all the same class and size - 72 ft steel hull.
During the race they were crewed by 17 amateurs and one professional skipper on that day they had us, some of my colleagues had never set foot on a yacht before let alone these sleek purpose built racing machines. I had always enjoyed sailing and this was a fantastic day out, particularly when under minimal guidance I skippered the boat for a few hours.
The cost to take part was 20k GBP per person, per leg and the race was divided into seven legs, a serious amount of money for someone who some months struggled to pay his staff. Nonetheless as I drove home I was trying to think of ways to raise the cash. By the time I arrived 4 hours later I had concluded the dream ended there... I couldn't leave my shop for several weeks and I knew if I had gone and loved it I could never go back to retailing upmarket Danish Hi-Fi and TVs and then what?
The race went the wrong way around the globe, sailing westward against the prevailing winds and the loss of BT sponsorship a few years later along with the increasing cost of maintaining the fleet and providing insurance for amateur sailors in the southern oceans proved too much.
So take your time, look at the options and find the one that works for you both, and Pineapple. Sometimes it takes a little while, other days it can be thrashed out in your head during a drive on the motorway.
Day to day stuff, finding a great apartment, getting around the city, where’s good, great cafés. Buying food, what’s expensive what’s really cheap.
All the tings you didn’t have on the boat that you missed. Healthcare costs insurance - doctor, dentist vet!
The stuff you would have liked to know before you arrived. Maybe you that all researched but you know how people, especially Americans love recommendations 😊
I’m sure some of your more adventurous followers would be interested.
In short the sh1t people need to survive in a foreign country.
This was definitely something I needed to read Cory! As we’ve talked about before I am still struggling to figure out my own journey and I catch myself sometimes getting too excited and thinking that once I start a new journey everything will be perfect and my life will make sense but I know that’s not how it works. Following your journey, reading about the times you struggle, honestly makes me feel better because I am seeing you make it through that struggle and it gives me the evidence I need to know that I can too!
I'm so pleased to hear I didn't scare you off of your dream!! There's probably nothing worse than having something you want to do but feeling too scared or not having the ability to do it in any reasonable timeline. THIS IS THE BETTER PATH. And i'm honestly starting to believe that you don't actually follow a new journey (or dream) so that everything will be perfect. You do it because you want to experience the thing & what it's like to be the person who did the thing. Then the perspective you get, even though it's not an elixir that helps everything feel better for infinity, is still worth billions.
And when you take care of 1 dream, it just leaves room for another 1 to form.
I'm actually now pivoting to another thing that i thought i always wanted to do "sometime", but figured I needed to make more money first, but this whole sailing thing has taught me, "No i can do whatever i want now, or ASAP, because I know I don't need that much money." And I really want to be a teacher! So you better believe I'm gonna explore that now!!
You aren’t performing your life, you are living it. That means it isn’t always pretty and you don’t have to take a path all the way to completion. Step off, move around, life is far less linear than society needs us to believe it is.
I'm impressed by the way you let us readers be part of your inner journey almost in real time - completely honest and pure.
What an inspiration on so many levels for me - for my writing, my own journey and how I inhabit the places I live in, for my exploration of who am I in this world, which contribution is mine and do I actually have to contribute at all... ¡Muchas gracias!
... And what a cliffhanger in your last paragraph 😉
Next time I read your article, my surroundings will have changed from jungle to Alps, from Latin American island time culture to the German cleanness and correctness. Curious how I'll read your next essay from there.
Thanks so much for this Anja! I'm so glad this connected with you in this way. It's always hard to publish an essay – especially when you're admitting you dark secrets haha. But I'm super grateful for people like you telling me that it's OK to do that, & if anything it actually helps you. What an honor & privilege!
Thanks for sharing this so honestly. In my experience, losing your passion or being "over" a dream that has sustained you for years is so disorienting, more so than any other life change. The void and confusion it creates feels scary, and the next dream can be so slow to appear. Hang in there, I hope you enjoy what comes next for you. Looking forward to reading more.
Thanks so much, & you’re so right! Thankfully I’ve gotten much better at embracing the surprise of it all. My curiosity & intrigue are turning toward my own life, with questions like “Where will it all go!?” Excitement, & much less stress. But yea, the transitions are SUPER tough, especially when we had something, gave it up, & don’t currently have something to replace it with. The thing I’ve learned is “figuring it out” isn’t even the point…
I love following your journey of self discovery Cory. There were so many things that resonated with me in this post. The idea of tiny experiments as you explore what’s next, as well as Pineapple’s reminder to find joy in the simple pleasures of life! I’m sitting on my bedroom floor right now to do my morning yoga, while my two dogs chase each other playfully around me - a perfect start to my day!
This is so beautiful, & I really appreciate the reflect! It’s about these tiny experiments. And I’m also realizing that sometimes my first impressions of something new aren’t the final ones, if I just keep going. That’s why a pact is so useful for me. I can keep going even past those moments that feel terrible, & get to the other side.
Pineapple is my best teacher, I swear. She’s only getting more wise as she gets older, too, which I love to see!
The part about grieving the version of yourself who knew he needed to sail felt so familiar. I think a lot of us know what it’s like to be between one version of our life and whatever comes next, even when our “sailboat” looked completely different. Thank you for being honest about that.
So glad & honored that you connected with this Vivienne! I’m starting to find that next future-sailor. He’s really just a future-explorer who isn’t afraid to be told no because he trusts that everything will turn out better, on some timeline, if he keeps going, aligned with what he knows is right, & works hard, into the unknown.
I love that. Maybe the next version isn’t another sailor at all, just someone willing to keep moving without knowing exactly what comes next. I hope you find him. 🤍
You both are so bright, talented, hardworking, accomplished and able bodied! You will no doubt find your way. May not look like you thought it might. Remember that old tenant, FEAR of people an economic insecurity will leave us, not people and economic insecurity. Sounds like sitting with uncertainty is anxiety provoking, no easy way to walk through that. I’m rooting for you!
I appreciate this so much, Mark!! I like, a lot. And thanks for the reminder about that fear leaving us. That’s a really important nuance. (Coming up on 19 years next month!!)
Corey, we subscribe and follow you not because we expect you to perform and be a certain way all of the time. Yes, living on the boat inspired us all in some ways, and we love your sense of adventure.
But I’ve learned life isn’t nonstop satisfaction and knowing what we want. It’s a lot of learning. It’s okay to not know what you want to do. It’s okay to still be figuring things out. It’s okay if you decide to stay in Guatemala and live a different life.
I think many are here not just for your boat life, but for what you embody, what you provoke in us, and who you are as a person.
We’re rooting for you, whether that be on the high seas or the colorful streets of Guatemala. Keep on keeping on, my friend! 💙
I really appreciate that, Brandi! And i know this, deep down. I really can't exaggerate how grateful I am that strangers have given my words some sort of extra consideration. You're spot on that life is all about learning, often bumbling forward in the dark, still assessing everything & making decisions from each new place. And at some point last week, I actually accepted that this is what my writing will be about when it's true, because I don't know how to be anything else.
I appreciate your words & connection so much! What I embody, what I provoke in you, & who I am as a person... Wow, that is something I'm taking with me today. And no matter what, I'll keep writing & sharing.
Thank you.
I always find your posts inspiring but this one might have impacted me the most. There is something so powerful about someone who inspires you saying “I don’t know what I’m doing.” It’s a great reminder that we all don’t really know what we’re doing in a way, but we just have to keep finding the next right thing that calls to us. Really enjoyed hearing the other examples from your readers as well. I travelled for a year after high school and it was amazing and gave me stories and so much perspective, but I never could have done it indefinitely. The next right thing after that was college. And now it’s figuring out what my writing life looks like (and that’s been a crazy adventure with so many ups and downs!)
Transitional periods are hard and I can’t wait to be out of the one I’m currently in, but I think there’s a beauty in it too. It’s a privilege to ‘keep figuring myself out’ and I try to remind myself of that everytime I’m in the pit of despair.
Can’t wait to read about whatever comes next!!!
Aleah, I'm so glad that you connected with this! I enjoyed our conversation last week SO MUCH. Thanks for sharing about your adventures, too. One of the things i learned from those comments last week was that many of us will simply "stay busy" doing something that *feels* productive, & that quiets the questions about "WHAT AM I DOING?" You can easily say, THIS! But only in retrospect will you know whether that thing was useful/meaningful/productive. It really shows me the importance of *moving*. Toward something. Either toward a dream, if you have one, or toward something important to you in that moment, at that time in your life, that may or may not have some "pay off" in the end. Because the pay off is moving toward the thing that's calling.
“The payoff is moving toward the thing that’s calling”!!!!
You have a way of putting things that makes concepts I’ve heard before but never truly metabolized really hit me!
Sometimes I think about the concept of “the golden years”. When I’m older, what will be the time in my life that I dream of/long for the most? Am I living “the golden years” right now and not truly appreciating it? what will actually be the most fulfilling in retrospect? Maybe the best part of life is in the in-between.
Thanks, Aleah! The best part of life are gonna include the times that were easy & beautiful, but also the ones that were most challenging in the moment. The latter will be extremely meaningful because you were faced with some hardship, you keep trudgin along, & you built toward something as a result (even it's "just" new knowledge about yourself). You are totally right about the Golden Years & I think about this all the time...
I remember when i was 19yo i lived in Australia by myself & now, 20 years later, I could talk for 60 minutes about the amazing parts about it, but the reality? I was miserable for much of it. Haha. My boyfriend had just broken up with me! I missed my friends back home! I was f*ing BROKE. But man, I tell you, when I got back I had some STORIES. And it was the coolest feeling having done something that people only talk about doing...
This is so true!! The worst times in my life were by far when I felt static, purposeless and bored. I feel grateful to have purpose, even if I don’t really know what I’m doing with it right now. It is comforting to tell myself that these could be the golden years, and I just don’t even know it yet. :)
I'm in a weird transition period of my life right now, too, and reading this really helped me feel less alone. Fittingly enough, my last post was about how I don't know what the heck I'm doing or where I'm going. I've also been starting to feel the glimmer of a horizon over the past few days, which makes me feel a lot better. Of course it's not anything related to any of my former dreams — being a mom, circumstances related to my family are now mainly dictating my path. But I'm at least starting to see and accept the beginning of a path laid in front of me, and it feels a lot better than flailing.
Interestingly enough, I was also sick through this last week and something about lying in bed gives more weight to an existential crisis. Glad you're feeling better and seem to be on the upswing.
I'm so happy that you're feeling better, too, & i totally understand what you're talking about with the added existential crisis. Also, i'm so happy that this essay meant something to you. I think it's soooo key to pay attention to those glimmers & not close your eyes or throw a towel over them or anything. i know tons of people who don't seem to get those new glimmers at all anymore, or they do but they instantly talk themselves out of pursuing them. Glad to hear, even though there are real constraints in your life, that you know you can chart a new path & walk it! And it's perfectly OK if it's something different. That's how sailing was for me. It can inject a new jolt of life into everything & expand your horizons so much more!
Hi Cory, many times in my 21 years of traveling I didn’t know the next step after being immersed in one culture and wondering what to do next.
This hits differently when we’re on the road full time, still working and managing life abroad but it will come to you, you can relax into the unknown and let it guide you.
It’s not structured like “regular life” so you can enjoy going off script and creating it as you go along.
I have faith in you, friend 🌝🌹
Thanks Mary! Love what you said about the different structure compared to "regular life". Being abroad doesn't fix everything, but at the same time it's providing a VERY different *container* than would exist back in the U.S. There have been moments where it's tempting to "just move back, get a job, get 'responsible' again." I think succumbing to that stuff would be the biggest mistake, because it's actually quite hard to do what you need when you have the pressures of a full-time job & American consumer culture & everything else yelling in your face..... as many people reading this can attest. So? I'm grateful for my in-between today :)
Yes exactly and because I know I’ll get sucked in again when I return to the USA, I often buy my plane ticket departure before I arrive.
Because I want to get back to traveling life as soon as I can.
This was such a real and inspirational read! Life isn’t really one adventure, but I’m realizing just a stack of adventures on top of each other! And I think - at least for me- we feel this pressure of THIS is me, and changing our minds or a new direction feels wrong or goes against that established self.
I love love love that eventually the narrow is gone and it’s cool and ok and normal to go seek out another bone.
And it makes me think we probs don’t savor what was enough while we are searching for the next bone.
So many great noodling thoughts in my brain because of reading this! Thank you!
Kayla, I'm so glad this touched you & gave you great noodling thoughts (including the bone/marrow metaphor). As a sharer of words, there's no greater compliment than that. And you're so dang right: it's a STACK of adventures. We all kinda acknowledge this when we think about life as a bunch of book chapters, right? But in a book, you are holding all the pages & you know even when there's a cliffhanger halfway through that the book goes on & likely all has some meaning. In life, the meaning isn't apparent at all times. So there's doubt. But like you said, we actually gotta savor it. And we DO have to trust that the next chapter is just waiting to emerge.
I also think just knowing lots of people experience this reminds me that it is all part of being a human! I feel this alot with big and small goals!
There is something incredibly humanizing, connecting, and validating about the questions and hardships you are sharing. I was partly drawn to your writing because of a past unactualized desire to live aboard a boat and sail. I’ve stuck around to hear more of your journey, maybe to revisit that desire, possibly imagining how it would have unfurled by living vicariously through you. This in-between phase you are in is hardly a disappointment. The weight of continuing to carry out my past unmet desire is not on you. The honesty you are sharing about your process is more valuable and I am thankful for it.
The current in-between or phase I am in, at least what I’m telling myself, is one of “hunkering down” and “getting more financially stable”. Giving myself around a year before deciding what the next venture will be. Whether I am actually shying away from taking action now or taking a needed step of preparation, I’m not sure. The hope is to find something fuller, something of greater vitality. Wondering if the right next steps are following the “glimmer”, whatever that is for me, whether it ultimately brings what I hope for or not. And maybe much of the value found in life is what is learned along the way of that pursuit.
Thanks again for sharing your journey.
I reallllly appreciate this honest message of both relateablility and also support. Thank you for sharing your journey, too. The journey you’re describing sounds really positive to me. Especially if the plan is to build the money you WOULD need for any move while also simultaneously testing out what that might be.
Even though i’m not in the advice-giving business per se, I’ve found though that merely focusing on the goal of “financial stability” isn’t specific enough, because you may just be searching for stability around a life that no longer works; and also, you don’t really know the target & therefore that can make it forever elusive. For example, i didn’t think I had enough money to start this sailing adventure because i never bothered to make the budget.
That said, if you’re not sure what you’re saving toward, it seriously helps to just get SUPER rigorous about saving/investing/paying down debts for its own sake. I’ve heard people say that’s boring, but I have also seen those people say that & stay miserable & stuck for years & years. You know that the pathways to the next thing has some relation to financial well-being, so imo THAT in & of itself is super exciting to get in order. Celebrate each win, even if it’s $100 or $500 here & there.
While I’m figuring out my next path, I am making a bit of cash teaching online (not related to the subject I want to make a “forever plan” but something I know well, enjoy decently, & helps plug the budget gaps), and it has honestly started to get super exciting because it’s relieving the budgetary pressures. Like it’s going to unlock the next step BECAUSE financial insecurity is less of a factor in whatever my next decision. But that said, I don’t want to feel TOO stable because it’s really not the life I want long-term.
I really hope that you discover your next step & then take it. Even if it’s crewing on other sailboats, or somehow getting out there & taking some big steps ASAP on a path that will lead to sailing. If that’s something you want to do, you won’t regret DOING IT (but may regret the alternative). Y
ou’ll never have everything figured out fulling & it’s truly amazing what can be built on the fly. I’m sooooo glad to hear that my journey hasn’t discouraged you but it sounds like it’s probably been the opposite, and that gives me great joy!
Keep testing your ideas, keep getting your financial house in order, jump before you feel read, & never give up the hope.
Thanks for the encouragement. It’s nice to get a nudge in a certain direction. This is probably the first time I’ve really been intentionally focused on saving up and it’s interesting to see how that shift in priorities impacts my day to day. Hoping to harness some of that excitement you mention to help get through the duller days. And yeah, I definitely want to start getting more clear on what I might be working towards. Testing things out in the meantime can be a fun process (at least I want it to be!). Look forward to hearing more about where your next steps lead you.
My dad had a lot of trouble after our 10 month sail figuring out what was next. "After sailing around the world, golf isnt really that interesing" he said. Being retired is a little different, since you dont really HAVE to do anything. But i think a lot of people struggle with what is next.
Oh wow, I bet! This is a phenomenon I've never heard people talk about, but it is like a real freaking thing!!
Back in 90s and early 2000s there was a round the world yacht race sponsored by British Telecom (BT) it was started by Chay Blyth in 1989 and took place every four years. Chay had sailed solo around the globe more than once.
As a Bang & Olufsen franchisee I was invited to Southampton on the southern coast of England along with many other franchisees for a day's sailing on one of the BT Challenge yachts. They were all the same class and size - 72 ft steel hull.
During the race they were crewed by 17 amateurs and one professional skipper on that day they had us, some of my colleagues had never set foot on a yacht before let alone these sleek purpose built racing machines. I had always enjoyed sailing and this was a fantastic day out, particularly when under minimal guidance I skippered the boat for a few hours.
The cost to take part was 20k GBP per person, per leg and the race was divided into seven legs, a serious amount of money for someone who some months struggled to pay his staff. Nonetheless as I drove home I was trying to think of ways to raise the cash. By the time I arrived 4 hours later I had concluded the dream ended there... I couldn't leave my shop for several weeks and I knew if I had gone and loved it I could never go back to retailing upmarket Danish Hi-Fi and TVs and then what?
The race went the wrong way around the globe, sailing westward against the prevailing winds and the loss of BT sponsorship a few years later along with the increasing cost of maintaining the fleet and providing insurance for amateur sailors in the southern oceans proved too much.
So take your time, look at the options and find the one that works for you both, and Pineapple. Sometimes it takes a little while, other days it can be thrashed out in your head during a drive on the motorway.
Thanks for sharing, Murray! You are heard!! And also congrats on the win against Mexico :)
Thanks Cory, I didn’t stay up as it was 2 am before they kicked off.
Could you write a few posts about the practicalities of living in Guatemala City?
Ummm I’m not exactly taking commissions, but I’m sure some of those topics will work their way into future posts! What do you mean by practicalities?
Day to day stuff, finding a great apartment, getting around the city, where’s good, great cafés. Buying food, what’s expensive what’s really cheap.
All the tings you didn’t have on the boat that you missed. Healthcare costs insurance - doctor, dentist vet!
The stuff you would have liked to know before you arrived. Maybe you that all researched but you know how people, especially Americans love recommendations 😊
I’m sure some of your more adventurous followers would be interested.
In short the sh1t people need to survive in a foreign country.
This was definitely something I needed to read Cory! As we’ve talked about before I am still struggling to figure out my own journey and I catch myself sometimes getting too excited and thinking that once I start a new journey everything will be perfect and my life will make sense but I know that’s not how it works. Following your journey, reading about the times you struggle, honestly makes me feel better because I am seeing you make it through that struggle and it gives me the evidence I need to know that I can too!
I'm so pleased to hear I didn't scare you off of your dream!! There's probably nothing worse than having something you want to do but feeling too scared or not having the ability to do it in any reasonable timeline. THIS IS THE BETTER PATH. And i'm honestly starting to believe that you don't actually follow a new journey (or dream) so that everything will be perfect. You do it because you want to experience the thing & what it's like to be the person who did the thing. Then the perspective you get, even though it's not an elixir that helps everything feel better for infinity, is still worth billions.
And when you take care of 1 dream, it just leaves room for another 1 to form.
I'm actually now pivoting to another thing that i thought i always wanted to do "sometime", but figured I needed to make more money first, but this whole sailing thing has taught me, "No i can do whatever i want now, or ASAP, because I know I don't need that much money." And I really want to be a teacher! So you better believe I'm gonna explore that now!!
You aren’t performing your life, you are living it. That means it isn’t always pretty and you don’t have to take a path all the way to completion. Step off, move around, life is far less linear than society needs us to believe it is.
I'm impressed by the way you let us readers be part of your inner journey almost in real time - completely honest and pure.
What an inspiration on so many levels for me - for my writing, my own journey and how I inhabit the places I live in, for my exploration of who am I in this world, which contribution is mine and do I actually have to contribute at all... ¡Muchas gracias!
... And what a cliffhanger in your last paragraph 😉
Next time I read your article, my surroundings will have changed from jungle to Alps, from Latin American island time culture to the German cleanness and correctness. Curious how I'll read your next essay from there.
Thanks so much for this Anja! I'm so glad this connected with you in this way. It's always hard to publish an essay – especially when you're admitting you dark secrets haha. But I'm super grateful for people like you telling me that it's OK to do that, & if anything it actually helps you. What an honor & privilege!
I hope you have safe travels to Europe!!
Thanks for sharing this so honestly. In my experience, losing your passion or being "over" a dream that has sustained you for years is so disorienting, more so than any other life change. The void and confusion it creates feels scary, and the next dream can be so slow to appear. Hang in there, I hope you enjoy what comes next for you. Looking forward to reading more.
Thanks so much, & you’re so right! Thankfully I’ve gotten much better at embracing the surprise of it all. My curiosity & intrigue are turning toward my own life, with questions like “Where will it all go!?” Excitement, & much less stress. But yea, the transitions are SUPER tough, especially when we had something, gave it up, & don’t currently have something to replace it with. The thing I’ve learned is “figuring it out” isn’t even the point…
I love following your journey of self discovery Cory. There were so many things that resonated with me in this post. The idea of tiny experiments as you explore what’s next, as well as Pineapple’s reminder to find joy in the simple pleasures of life! I’m sitting on my bedroom floor right now to do my morning yoga, while my two dogs chase each other playfully around me - a perfect start to my day!
This is so beautiful, & I really appreciate the reflect! It’s about these tiny experiments. And I’m also realizing that sometimes my first impressions of something new aren’t the final ones, if I just keep going. That’s why a pact is so useful for me. I can keep going even past those moments that feel terrible, & get to the other side.
Pineapple is my best teacher, I swear. She’s only getting more wise as she gets older, too, which I love to see!
I am so happy to hear from you!
-Cory
I got unexpectedly emotional reading this.
The part about grieving the version of yourself who knew he needed to sail felt so familiar. I think a lot of us know what it’s like to be between one version of our life and whatever comes next, even when our “sailboat” looked completely different. Thank you for being honest about that.
So glad & honored that you connected with this Vivienne! I’m starting to find that next future-sailor. He’s really just a future-explorer who isn’t afraid to be told no because he trusts that everything will turn out better, on some timeline, if he keeps going, aligned with what he knows is right, & works hard, into the unknown.
I love that. Maybe the next version isn’t another sailor at all, just someone willing to keep moving without knowing exactly what comes next. I hope you find him. 🤍
I love this.
I pretend I do, at least lol
haha sometimes i do, too. But it is hard to keep up the façade!
You both are so bright, talented, hardworking, accomplished and able bodied! You will no doubt find your way. May not look like you thought it might. Remember that old tenant, FEAR of people an economic insecurity will leave us, not people and economic insecurity. Sounds like sitting with uncertainty is anxiety provoking, no easy way to walk through that. I’m rooting for you!
I appreciate this so much, Mark!! I like, a lot. And thanks for the reminder about that fear leaving us. That’s a really important nuance. (Coming up on 19 years next month!!)